It was summer 1986. Days when red wine flowed slowly and beer was just a sip away. These are the words of make-believe and what appears to be normal is just a stone throw away. I write about love, doing the right thing and living in a world where everything is already planned. The rules established, the signals given, where the only thing one questions is the spelling of a word. It is on this note that I speak about Sarah. Who, just by looking at her, you would have thought she lives the perfect life. She had the perfect parents, who loved her continuously.
Sarah lived in this world of reality, this world of make-believe. At a young age, she was taught what was right, how to think and how to behave. Sarah learned well. She loved what she did and all those around her. She learned the importance of living in this world. Everything was smooth with Sarah until the age of 13. At this point in life, when puberty almost meets adulthood and childish ways are still a memory that they can’t let go, Sarah had her first awakening that would leave an undying mark on her life not only in this moment but for the rest of her life. What she new was love, her innermost desires and a craving that enraptured her being. She wanted love from everyone, especially boys her own age. Keep in mind, this was back then—a time of sharing her love with more than just one. This was a time of jealousy among girls and chauvinism among boys. This was Sarah’s world, one moment to the next. She was castigated by those she thought were her friends and scorned by those she barely knew. Her pretty face, her blonde hair, her love of life was thrown into a plastic ball and set aflame.
Sarah wanted love and was given scorn. She wanted to be accepted, but life does not run so smoothly. She wanted to have friends without judgment. What she wanted and what she surrounded herself with came crashing together. At a very young age, Sarah learned by the harsh realities of life that if you don’t fit in, there is a world out there that will do whatever it takes, especially at a young age, especially by those who are conditioned by the media, those whose minds are so engulfed in doing the right thing—God forbid anyone sways from this protocol of what right “should” be. They will be chastised, if not banished, to a level where life is no longer worth living. It was on this level that Sarah’s reality came into being. Her world was shattered. She wanted out. She no longer could survive. She no longer could live in happiness.
What Sarah began to do was create a plan so that what she wanted would actually happen. She learned about “cutting,” a serious defacement of slits on one’s body, and in this case, wrists. This was not make-believe. It was no longer a game. In a given period of time, it was over and everyone went home happy. What is a parent to do when these facts are presented? As a parent, I would be frantic. As a parent who followed the medical protocol and adhered to those who “supposedly” knew, I would attentively listen and, as recommended, send her away for help. And Sarah was sent away from one building to another. As all protocol goes, as all medical possibilities go, the real cause was never really addressed. A young girl cannot heal from a desire to kill herself simply by taking the knife away. A young girl cannot heal herself from a death wish by giving her more and more medication. What they don’t realize is that these medications can be taken in large doses, producing lethal effects. This was Sarah’s will beginning at age 15.
Sarah was diagnosed with many labels from depression to anxiety to bipolar disorder, but the truth is, Sarah was simply searching to be in a state of love. At age 15, she was diagnosed and was placed in a cookie cutter of expectations. She could no longer belly laugh because the medications cut those feelings out. There was a blockage of life. Just as feelings of suicide were extreme, so were the tears of joy and belly laughs. For these were extreme feelings of living, sharing and just being happy and in the moment. This was Sarah’s life from the age of 15 to the age of 29.
Sarah endured 14 years of not knowing who she was, what she could do and what she could feel. She had no joy. Just a black shroud of life that covered up her radiant light for 14 long years. With no hope of ever getting off the medications, she continued to live in a world where suicide was always an option. Sarah understood these rules. With medications as her baseline form of treatment, the reality of what was real, what was love and what could be was a drastic change. It was at this point in her life that I met her. Sarah joined my 30-Day Raw Challenge. She wanted a healthier lifestyle. I spoke to her as she was deciding to sign up, and it appeared she was somewhat interested in changing her diet. Her responses, for whatever reason, reached me on a level I had not experienced in a long time. She was confident, quirky, funny and, most of all, she had this huge pink pocketbook! I thought to myself, “Of all the colors to choose, why did she pick that one?”
We spoke briefly, about our jobs and lives. All in all, there seemed to be a lack of emotional connection on her part. I saw her as a soul that I could especially help. I spoke about what I do, the people I help and the foods I wanted her to eat. I shared with her the basics on health and healing. This is my routine with all participants joining the program.
It was at this same time that my housemate began to speak about dating. I rarely date but became intrigued by the idea and decided to ask Sarah out. She stopped over my house. She stayed two-and-a-half hours, and that was it. She spoke to me and my housemates and then left. For whatever reason, her presence stabbed a jagged edge into my soul. I literally wanted her to be a part of my life. As a raw foodist who eats mostly fruit and works obsessively, I felt the love of life and the missing link for which I had a sore void. Everything that tied her down and squashed her into a box, I connected with. She spoke briefly, but I was superimpressed by her every action. How she carried herself, how she interacted and how she was completely real to my truth. I then did what any backward guy, who was somewhat infatuated, would do. I texted Sarah over and over and over and over. I texted her at least 10 to 15 times. After days of no response, I began to get the message. I am not sure why I texted her so many times, and to this day I do not know why she never responded, but I continued to text her occasionally for the next six months. What was I thinking? What was she thinking? The final answer can only be this: What is meant to be will be.
Then on a hot day this summer, I was informed that one of my work-exchange employees was leaving. She worked three days per week, and I desperately needed someone to replace her. I began to ask and ask anyone who I could find. All to no avail. I reached a point of desperation on August 10 at 9:20 p.m.. to be exact. I questioned the angels from above and asked them about Sarah. Would she possibly be able to move in with me? I had my guidelines of what she should be like:
- A raw vegan who eats pretty much like I do.
- A woman who, like me, has a mission to create an energetic movement for the transformation to a disease-free world.
- And last but not least, someone who would be willing to sleep on the floor in my small spare room.
These were my criteria. This idea seemed almost totally impossible. I requested Sarah by name to be this woman, and although it was seemingly beyond reach, within seven minutes it became a reality. As it turns out, Sarah was also at a point of desperation on this day. She was emotionally overwhelmed by her job and spiraling out of control. After an appointment with her doctor, she was informed that her medications “were not working for her anymore” and that her only hope was to try other medications until one worked. She quickly realized that if she did not do something different, she would soon be 30 years old and on medications that she loathed for half her life. She had only one hope, only one chance and that was to create the drastic change she had desperately wanted for the past 14 years. It was on this verge of desperation that she texted me back just seven minutes after my own cry for help. My friends, what happened over the next month could only be described as “beyond.” It was a total miracle from a medical modality.
Sarah and I met a few days later. She explained her dilemma, past, fears and goals and what she wanted most in her life. She wanted to stop medicating. She wanted to get a job with purpose. She wanted and wanted and wanted. What she wanted most of all was love for herself and the experience of joy in her life. All these wants were all legitimate and possible. I heard her words, plea for help and the desperation in her voice to do whatever it takes for her to achieve her goals. It was under these auspices that I began my mentorship with her. My reasons for doing it were not what they first appeared to be. For everything that appears to be is not always what truly is. It was not because she is beyond beautiful, not because she has a radiant and humble innocence in her presence, not because she wants to move in with me and help me in my mission. I saw her as the hope for today’s youth. The idea that drugs are not the answer. The idea that the human body is a miraculous machine that is genetically coded not to be sick nor under emotional stress. Most of all, the body is not to be dependent on drugs or medications. This was my golden opportunity not only to speak these words but to prove them.
Sarah was a willing student who came to me by way of a higher power and I, Arnold N. Kauffman, would do whatever it took to change her perspective on life and change it from a dark, bleary and hopeless world to a radiantly healthy life awaiting with open arms. So we began our transformation. Primarily, it was her diet choices. Sarah was placed on a strict regimen consisting of fruit in the morning because it is rich in calories and requires little energy for digestion. This enables the body to heal itself and, in Sarah’s case, to detoxify the chemical buildup in her body caused by taking these medications for 14 years. I made sure that, for lunch, Sarah ate an avocado salad. This was to give her enough calories so that she is not tempted to binge at nighttime. On a daily basis, I reminded her to have her dinner between 6 and 7 p.m. Most nights, this consisted of a banana whip. Banana whips, which are frozen bananas run through a Champion juicer, are nutrient rich, calling for little energy to be spent on digestion. I was also able to get a hold of a used rebounder, one of the best ways to exercise. It is one of the few exercises that literally cleans out the lymphatic system. It will flush the waste out of interstitial cellular fluid to allow the immune system more room to do its job. T8 “killer cells,” which contain hydrogen peroxide, are then able to do their job to seek and destroy any cancerous cells.
Finally, Sarah and I worked together to develop a mantra that resonated with her. This is essential to create a positive emotional environment in the body and sustain her during any periods of instability. Using this regimen, Sarah safely weaned herself off medications within three weeks. Altogether, this protocol serves as an easy and doable way to heal any disease, not just for Sarah, but for anyone with any illness whether it be physical or mental in nature.
Sarah is not completely healed; however, she is well on her way. She is an elegant, fearless and grounded woman. In one month, she quit her job, stopped her medication and moved into my house for a work-trade program. Go figure. I never gave up on Sarah, and she never gave up on me.